File this one under the category of watch your language. The language we use when we are trying to change something simply amazes me. We say things like I cant - its not fair - Ill never be able to do this - etc. And then we wonder why we are frustrated and dont feel so good. One of the most limiting things we say to ourselves is I have to. Our brains hear I have to and tend to automatically rebel. Perhaps its a holdover from childhood. A much more useful way to talk to ourselves is to change our I have to into I get to. You might say that this is just semantics. I would answer by saying its almost all semantics. Heres why - I have to usually leads to little motivation, avoidance, and grudging obligation. On the other hand, I get to often leads to motivation, excitement and opportunity. So lets practice turning your I have tos into I get tos. I have to take out the trash. I get to contribute to and serve my family. I have to get up in the morning. I get to spend another day above ground and see what I can make of it. I have to go to work. I get to go do something I love and provide for my family. I have to go to class. I get to have the privilege of getting an education. I have to pick up my kids from practice. I get to spend time with my children. In the car, which is a captive audience where we dont have the pressure of just staring at each other. Maybe we will be able to talk. I have to finish this project for the office. I get to contribute to something I believe in. I have to go to the gym. I get to take care of my body and maybe even have some fun. I have to finish this column and get it in on time. I get to have the privilege of helping (hopefully) more people. These are just a few examples. Simply fill in the blanks with the ones from your own life which will be most helpful to you. I invite you to practice watching your language this next week I think you will be surprised how often you use the phrase I have to. Have to vs get to is your choice. |
